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Self-Disclosure
Self-disclosure is making known information about oneself. We disclose a great deal
about ourselves through our facial expression, posture, clothing, tone of voice, and countless
other nonverbal cues, though much of that behavior is unintentional. But "self-disclosure" is
intentional. Self-disclosure is an attempt to let authenticity enter our social relationships, and we
now know that it is related both to mental health and self-concept development.

Trust and Reciprocity
Although at times strangers make startling self-disclosures in face-to-face counters, these
usually have few consequences. When we make our supposed disclosures to strangers we
have very little to lose.
Authentic self-disclosure – whether between acquaintances, coworkers, friends, or lovers
–tends to be reciprocal. It is an exchange process that often results in more positive feelings
between the two. Research confirms that when one person discloses something about
himself or herself to another, he or she tends to elicit a reciprocal level of openness in the
second person. This pattern is called the dyadic effect (Jourard ).
Reciprocal self-disclosure tends to be gradual. And it takes place only after the two
people have reached a basic level of trust or solidarity.
Close relationships sometimes generate secrecy rather than openness, hiding problems
until it becomes too late to solve them. Vanlear (1987) found increasing private-personal
disclosure between dyads “until they reached a zenith (usually toward the end of the
relationship), which was followed by a sharp decline” (p. 314).

To Disclose or Not Disclose
People often use self-disclosure in order to maintain or develop relationships; however,
on occasion disclosing can be manipulative. The main motives for disclosure may be different:
- to tell the other person what is troubling you,
- to clarify experiences for yourself,
- get the other person to reciprocate by also talking,
- to create an impression of yourself,
- to keep the other person up to date on his or her life,
- to control and manipulate the other person,
- to enhance the relationship by letting the other person know something that will increase
the intimacy, depth, and breadth of their relationship
Self-disclosure can be risky, and when we avoid disclosing, one of the primary reasons
may be that we fear projecting a negative image. Other reasons for not disclosing including
fear that information given may later be used against us, losing control over the other person or
the situation, not wanting to seem like an exhibitionist, and not wanting to commit oneself
publicly to something.
Sometimes the bottom line is vulnerability: you might reject me and that's something I will
not risk. The paradox is that fear of rejection keeps me from disclosing essential aspects of
myself, but this very withholding makes it impossible for me to be known (Rossenfield 1979).

Criteria for Appropriate Self-Disclosure
Self-disclosure is an attempt to let authenticity enter our social relationships. At times it
is an attempt to emphasize how we enact our roles rather than how others expect us to