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Source: Based on ideas in Kiely, M. (1993, October). When “no” means
“yes.” Marketing, 7–9.
For an example of the importance of nonverbal communication, imagine that
you’re a customer interested in opening a new bank account. At one bank, the bank

officer is dressed neatly. She looks you in the eye when she speaks. Her tone is
friendly. Her words are easy to understand, yet she sounds professional. “Thank you
for considering Bank of the East Coast. We appreciate this opportunity and would
love to explore ways that we can work together to help your business grow,” she says
with a friendly smile.
At the second bank, the bank officer’s tie is stained. He looks over your head
and down at his desk as he speaks. He shifts in his seat and fidgets with his hands.
His words say, “Thank you for considering Bank of the West Coast. We appreciate
this opportunity and would love to explore ways that we can work together to help
your business grow,” but he mumbles, and his voice conveys no enthusiasm or
warmth.
Which bank would you choose?
The speaker’s body language must match his or her words. If a Sender’s words
and body language don’t match—if a Sender smiles while telling a sad tale, for
example—the mismatch between verbal and nonverbal cues can cause a Receiver to
actively dislike the Sender.
Here are a few examples of nonverbal cues that can support or detract from a
Sender’s Message.
Body Language
A simple rule of thumb is that simplicity, directness, and warmth convey
sincerity. And sincerity is key to effective communication. A firm handshake, given
with a warm, dry hand, is a great way to establish trust. A weak, clammy handshake
conveys a lack of trustworthiness. Gnawing one’s lip conveys uncertainty. A direct
smile conveys confidence.
Eye Contact
In business, the style and duration of eye contact considered appropriate vary
greatly across cultures. In the United States, looking someone in the eye (for about a
second) is considered a sign of trustworthiness.
Facial Expressions
The human face can produce thousands of different expressions. These
expressions have been decoded by experts as corresponding to hundreds of different
[8]
emotional states. Our faces convey basic information to the outside world.
Happiness is associated with an upturned mouth and slightly closed eyes; fear with an
open mouth and wide-eyed stare. Flitting (“shifty”) eyes and pursed lips convey a
lack of trustworthiness. The effect of facial expressions in conversation is
instantaneous. Our brains may register them as “a feeling” about someone’s
character.
Posture
The position of our body relative to a chair or another person is another
powerful silent messenger that conveys interest, aloofness, professionalism—or lack
thereof. Head up, back straight (but not rigid) implies an upright character. In

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