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8. What is the goal of this communication? Ask yourself this question at
different points during the communication to keep the information flow on track.
Be polite. Differences in opinion can be the starting point of consensus.
9. It’s great to be surprised. Listen with an open mind, not just for what

you want to hear.
10. Pay attention to what is not said. Does the Sender’s body language

seem to contradict her Message? If so, clarification may be in order.
Adapted from information in Barrett, D. J. (2006). Leadership communication.
New York: McGraw-Hill/Irwin; Improving verbal skills. Retrieved July 2, 2008,
from http://www.itstime.com/aug97.htm; Ten tips: Active Listening from
Communication at work. (2007, June 4). Retrieved July 2, 2008,
fromhttp://communication.atwork-network.com/2007/06/04/ten-tips-active-listening.
Career-Friendly Communications
Communication can occur without your even realizing it. Consider the
following: Is your e-mail name professional? The typical convention for business e-
mail contains some form of your name. While an e-mail name like “LazyGirl” or
“DeathMonkey” may be fine for chatting online with your friends, they may send the
wrong signal to individuals you e-mail such as professors and prospective employers.
• Is your outgoing voice mail greeting professional? If not, change it.
Faculty and prospective recruiters will draw certain conclusions if, upon calling
you, they hear a message that screams, “Party, party, party!”
• Do you have a “private” social networking Web site on MySpace.com,
Facebook.com, or Xanga.com? If so, consider what it says about you to employers
or clients. If it is information you wouldn’t share at work, it probably shouldn’t be
there.
• Googled yourself lately? If not, you probably should. Potential
employers have begun searching the Web as part of background checking and you
should be aware of what’s out there about you.
Communication Freezers
Communication freezers put an end to effective communication by making the
Receiver feel judged or defensive. Typical communication stoppers include critizing,
blaming, ordering, judging, or shaming the other person. The following are some
[1]
examples of things to avoid saying:
1. Telling people what to do:
o “You must…”
o “You cannot…”
2. Threatening with “or else” implied:
o “You had better…”
o “If you don’t…”
3. Making suggestions or telling other people what they ought to do:
o “You should…”
o “It’s your responsibility to…”
4. Attempting to educate the other person:
o “Let me give you the facts.”
o “Experience tells us that…”

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